At last! A cure!

Finally, my years of struggling with mental illness are over! A wonderful chap has come up with a delightful method for curing mental illness.

He’s going to punch me in the face. Well, not punching exactly:

At this point I would like to explain the difference between a stun and a punch. With the Kadir-Buxton Method, a patient standing on one leg whilst holding a rose would still be standing on one leg and holding a rose when they were cured. With a punch, the patient would be lying prone on the floor, and could well have dropped the rose. And just to add insult to injury, they would still be mentally ill. Try it for yourselves if you do not believe me.

I tried it out on someone. It did the opposite, and they suddenly became afflicted with acute narcissistic rage. So, evidently I am not fully qualified to perform this operation. But who is? Who can cure my psychoses?

For those who cannot wait for Governments and Churches to get on board and have difficulty in finding someone to train to use this method, you will find that higher grade martial artists, boxers, and professional dancers have the skills to pick it up fast; Muhammad Ali actually managed the Kadir-Buxton Method on his first attempt, which was a first for me.

All the martial artists I know would just turn to me and ask me what the hell I was on about – I very much doubt they’d hit me in the face, even if I provoked them.

I cannot think of a way to disprove this claim, short of finding Muhammad Ali and asking him. But then again, it’s not documented anywhere except on this guy’s website. Suspicious.

Oh, and thank you Dan for pointing this guy out to me. It seems I have a new hobby.

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